Sometimes when you are going through changes in your life from a place you don’t like to a place that you want to be the ego will kick back and try to stop you. If this happens to you it’s completely fine and know that you are completely fine too. There is nothing wrong with you for experiencing this even if your ego is telling you that there is.
Let’s change that to ESPECIALLY if your ego is saying that there is!
To get through this phase you need to take action in a different way to get beyond what is trying to stop you. Trying to do more of what you were doing isn’t going to work. Trying to work harder, work smarter or be better at what you were doing just won’t work.
Imagine that you are driving down a straight road in a car. If the steering wheel is aligned correctly then holding it the right way up will have you driving in the direction that you want to go. Easy isn’t it?
Now imagine being in that same car but when you hold the steering wheel the right way up the wheels are locked to a full left turn. You have the steering wheel aiming in the correct way to drive straight but all that you are doing is going around in circles. Is holding it straighter going to make the car drive more straight?
Not at all. You are just going to keep going round and round in circles. Telling yourself how rubbish you are because you can’t even manage to go in a simple straight line. What you need is alignment. The wheels represent the ego and the steering wheel represents your vision or where you want to go. When those two are aligned and you have the driving force (the engine) powering you it is much easier to get to where you want to be. So here’s how you get the alignment.
GETTING YOUR EGO ALIGNED
1. You need to get all of those little messages that your ego is giving you out of your head and onto paper. No typing this out you must use a pen and some paper. You really need to exhaust this list as well. If you have to sit there for 30 minutes staring at just a few lines then that is what you are going to have to do.
2. Looking at your list you need to write down the answer the this question.
“By believing this about myself, what is it that I am trying to be right about?”
Really get all of those juicy things that you believe. about yourself out of you and onto that paper. These are the things that are really pointing your wheels. This is what is keeping you stuck and going around in circles.
3. Now you need to work out what is the pay-off that you are getting from this. Feeling bad releases chemicals into the bloodstream just the same way that feeling good does. These chemicals give us a hit like taking drugs. So I want you to feel for a moment the feelings that you get from believing this stuff to be true. Allow yourself to pretend that all of this stuff is true and try it on like a new coat. What does it feel like? This is the drug that you are creating inside of yourself. This is your pay-off.
4. Next you need to decide on who you want to be. List out all of the things that you say to yourself by being that person and the things that you believe about yourself. Take time with this and really exhaust it.
5. Now you need to look at the differences between the two lists and notice what you are going to have to let go of to be the new you without all of the baggage. Some of this your ego wants to hold on to for the pay-off. It is up to you now to decide between being a negative drug addict or being free. Go through each thing one at a time and declare to let it go. Say out loud that you are letting it go and what you are going to say or believe instead.
Carry your new thoughts and beliefs around with you in your wallet or purse and read them many times throughout the day until the are a part of you and automatic.
Doing this at times of struggle is going to help you massively. If you have found this useful to you do me a favour and share it so that someone else can get to benefit from it too.
If you need help going through this or anything else simply book in for a session with me either face to face or online.